Funny Forward to keep you SANE

I got this forward from a friend (I just kept my favorite ones). It’s not often that I really love reading forwards, but this one was an exception:).

* Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t Disguise Your Voice.
*Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
*In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ‘ For Smuggling Diamonds’.
*Finish All Your sentences with ‘In Accordance With The Prophecy’.
*Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
*Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is ‘To Go’.
*Sing Along At The Opera.
*Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don’t Rhyme?
*Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and play tropical Sounds All Day.
*Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can’t attend Their Party Because You’re Not In the Mood.
*Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
*When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream ‘I Won! I Won!’
*When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling ‘Run For Your Lives! They’re Loose!’
*Tell Your Children Over Dinner, ‘Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.’
*At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow down.