Thoughts on Body Image and Self Esteem

Okay, so first things first. Thank you to everyone who has participated in the quiz! I’m getting a lot of people coming from other people’s blogs who wrote about it, and that has helped immensely in getting a bigger response. So thank you! You still have 3 days left to take the quiz and enter to win–enter in the post below! But I couldn’t wait to discuss the subject any longer, and I’d LOVE to have any and all input you have as well:). Sorry for the lengthy post!

On to some things that have been on my mind concerning self esteem and body image. I definitely need to ‘practice what I preach’, so don’t think I’m judging anyone. Mostly it is what I have to remind myself over and over. And I’m LDS, so a lot of my thoughts will be of a religious nature:). Just so’s you know. I also realize that self-esteem isn’t solely based on our looks. I feel like they are connected at times because if we are not happy with the way we look and that stops us from reaching our full potential, we are not being true to ourselves. And if we aren’t being true to ourselves, can we truly be happy?

How long does a good compliment last for you, as far as physical appearance? A few minutes, hours, days, weeks? If you are like me, then a compliment doesn’t last for long. If you even believe them at all.

Now, what about a compliment that has to do with who we are? That we are thoughtful, kind, considerate, creative, talented, etc. For me, those types of compliments last a really long time. I still remember them, even years later, and they still make me feel happy.

What I’m getting at is, just like everything else in the world, looks are temporary. We will get older, we have kids, our boobs sag, our bottoms sag, wrinkles come…our looks will change. Don’t you think Satan just loves it when we criticize ourselves so much? Don’t you think when we are about to jump in the shower and cringe at our image in the mirror, that he is thinking he’s doing a great job at tearing us down…at keeping us from loving ourselves fully…at taking our thoughts away from those we love because we are focusing on ourselves and what we don’t like…at valuing our self worth on what we see looking back at us in the mirror? He does, after all, want to make us miserable like himself. (2 Nephi 2:27). What an incredibly easy way for Satan to destroy us!

The way the media is, I think we feel that if we could just change this or that, then we can be truly happy and just get on with your life. But isn’t that how everything in the world is? If you just have more of this or just had that, then you’ll be content. I think that ‘looks’ fall into this category as well. No matter what we look like, we could probably always find something else we’d like to change. Just look at the amount of plastic surgery done on people, especially in Hollywood. They are never satisfied with what they have, even as beautiful as they are! And believe me when I say I have seriously contemplated getting some work done, so I ain’t judging:).

In the LDS church, we hear over and over that if everyone just realized our worth as children of God, then we would really love ourselves. But how do you do that? How do you really feel that worth? I find myself worrying about what others think too often. I know it’s a waste of time, because I should be spending my time doing something worthwhile. I’ve found that the closer I am to the Lord, the less I worry about what others think of me. The more I follow promptings from the Spirit, the more I begin to like myself and care less about my looks. The more I pray and read my scriptures, the more I am “in tune” with my real self–with my spirit.

To wrap up my seemingly endless thoughts on the subject (sorry!), a couple days ago, after spending a few minutes in front of the mirror getting ready for the day, but tearing down myself the whole time, I got down on my knees to pray. I asked the Lord to just help me accept the way I look, so I could just feel like no one else’s opinion matters and just be happy and get over this awful feeling of not being enough by the world’s standards. I opened my scriptures and read for a bit, then just sat in my bed and thought. As I was sitting there, an overwhelming feeling of love came over me from Heavenly Father, and the thoughts entered my head, “I think you are beautiful, and I am God.” And you know what? I felt like it wasn’t only about looks, it was with me and who I am. That feeling from God of love and approval for who I am is a million times better than feeling beautiful by the world’s standards.

And that’s what I wanted to tell you all. I know that it sounds cliche and all that, but seriously, God is our Father. He created us. He loves us, and He thinks that YOU are beautiful, inside and out…and He is God.

Now, the world can just go away because, when I feel like that, all I want to do is please Him. It is a constant struggle to love myself, but one of my weaknesses that I am determined to make strong, with God’s help. (Ether 12:27) He does, after all, know what we can become, and this whole struggle with our self-image thing can really get in the way:).