In the Moment

Yesterday was a crazy day. I had errands to run in the morning, Carson had a dentist appointment, we had lunch with friends, and Bailey was awake a good part of the day wanting to eat due to her lovely 5 hour stretch of sleep the night before (WOOHOO!!!).

Our good friends invited us out to dinner to celebrate Jake’s birthday (Happy Birthday Jake!). I would be dropping the kids off at Janina and Greg’s house, then taking Bailey to Rachelle’s house before to try and get some pictures taken of her. Janina and Greg had kindly agreed to watch my boys for the date–Rachelle had as well, so thank you to both my sisters:). I was REALLY excited to go socialize with friends and go out on a date with Dillon.

LONG story short, I was running late since Bailey woke up to eat right when I’d planned to leave, we had to get gas, and I for some strange reason unknown to me, cannot remember how awful TRAFFIC is at this time of day, or just really everyday compared to the non-existent traffic in Tooele county. So I was late dropping off the boys, late getting to Rachelle’s, Bailey didn’t cooperate for the pictures really (or at all), and I was almost an hour late getting to dinner. Dillon ordered me a yummy Filet Mignon wrapped in bacon. Mmmmm. So good. So I was only with everyone and on a date for a total of less than an hour…so bummed. Dillon was nice enough to stay with me in the car while I fed Bailey again so we talked for a while longer. Bailey started screaming on the way back to Janina’s like she was hungry so Dillon took the van to pick up the boys while I took the truck and fed her once more before going home. She really just can’t stay awake long enough to eat efficiently sometimes. Silly girl:).

NOW I’m getting to the main point of this post, so stick with me here. As I was nursing Bailey on the side of some deserted road and listening to the radio, a song came on the radio by Brad Paisley that I really like. It’s a love song, called She’s Everything, which I LOVE as a love song, however, as I was snuggling little Bailey and the end part of the song came on, I was filled with gratitude for this little bundle of joy we have. The end of the song says:

“Everyday that passes I only love her more
Yeah, she’s the one
That I’d lay down my own life for
And she’s everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
She’s everything to me. ” (2nd song on playlist)

I started driving home, with her hiccuping by my side, and I remembered how much I enjoy driving trucks and listening to good country music (or just good music), and thought back to dating Dillon and how much fun we had together. I thought about how much I love my family and how blessed we are. I thought about another song I heard on my way to dinner by Earl Thomas Conley called, “What She Is (Is a Woman In Love)”. The whole song is about how the man she married isn’t perfect, but she sees only the good and what she wants to see. (See the bottom of this post for the lyrics). I think I could really use that more, not just in my marriage, but with EVERYTHING. Which then brought me to President Monson’s talk in General Conference about living in the moment. In my sleep-deprived state, I have been having numerous amounts of “bad-mommy-moments” throughout the day with my older kiddo’s. I worry about the past, I worry about the future, and I decided that I would be more determined to live in the moment and enjoy life NOW. Sure, we all have problems, but man, how sad to let life pass us by without enjoying the NOWS in life.

So this morning I woke up at 6:00 am to feed Bailey after she had slept for 6 hours!!! Way to go baby! I loved that moment:). She went back to sleep after that until 9:30. The boys crawled into bed with me around 7:30 and were excited to tell me all about the night before with their cousins, and I really focused on just enjoying the moment. I know it will take a lot of work. I have realized that I won’t be happy if my thoughts are always negative. I have to change my way of thinking. We went downstairs and the first little bump in this “moment-living” came up. Carson threw a fit because Devon was sitting where he wants to. Instead of throwing my own grown-up tantrum and not having patience with him, I tried giving him a hug, talking calmly, and helped him through something that seemed so silly to me, but for some reason was important to him. He did a complete turn-around and we had a pleasant breakfast all together without me being angry at him and him being okay sitting somewhere else. It wasn’t a pleasant moment to begin with, but I recalled my sister Janina saying she just tries to get through that 5 minutes without losing her temper. So true.

I am a very imperfect person, but I think that I haven’t been enjoying life to it’s fullest. I will try harder to live in the moment…happily.

A Woman In Love Lyrics
There’s a lot of nice things,
That he never told her,
And he forgets to hold her
When she needs him sometimes
The promises he made her
He never got around to
Still the thought of leavin’
Never crossed her mind.

What she sees is only what she wants to,
What she has, she thinks is enough
What she does is just look at the good things
And what she is, is a woman in love.

He forgets to call her,
So he keeps her waiting,
He’s always breaking the plans that she’s made,
There’s so many good things
That he never gave her
But it never mattered to her anyway,

And he’s just an ordinary guy
Like you and I
And she’s looking at him with her heart
And not her eyes.

*I do want to say that Dillon tries much harder than the man talked about in this song:).*